Finding the blessing in the adversity
By: Melanie Amini-Hajibashi, Licensed Professional Counselor
The other day I went rock climbing. As I tightened the harness around my legs and clipped into the ascending rope to begin climbing, I thought, “this is exactly what life feels like”. Gripping on for dear life, I swung my arm to grab the purple rock and I missed. I tried again. I missed. I tried again. I missed. Until I was so exhausted I had to accept defeat and give up. I wasn’t ready. A statement I don’t like to admit. As I packed up for the day, I thought, “sometimes, we have to grip onto life with our mere finger tips, stand on ground that is barely there, calculator our next move even when there is not 100% certainty that we will make it, and accept when we are not ready…yet”.
As a competitive person by nature, I’ve learned that failure is a part of my process. I’ve failed more times then I’ve won, but each time I’ve failed I found the lesson in the adversity. This is exactly what Napoleon Hill shares in his secrets to success; finding the blessing in the adversity.
Within my community, we say, “life doesn’t happen to you, life happens for you”. With a simple shift in mindset, we can move from defeat, anger, sadness, and shame, to a mindset of growth, gratitude, and purpose. I know that shifting into this mindset is not easy. You may ask, how can I find the blessing in loosing someone I love? Losing my job? My relationship? Experiencing trauma?
More often than not, we can only connect the dots moving backward. Allow time to make sense of your experiences. Self-reflection is one of the most powerful tools we as humans have. One of my favorite tools is to create a road map of where I’ve been and where I’m going. Within this road map, I put wins and adversities. This way, I can visually see that I’ve survived 100% of the moments I thought I wouldn’t.
Call to action: Give road mapping a try. Create a visual representation of all your “pivotal moments” in life. These are moments in your life that stand out to you, moments where memories are easily accessible, and moments that defined you as a person. Some of the moments are going to be GREAT! Some of these moments might be laced in shame. Map them all. After you are done with the mapping, for each moment, find the blessing and write it down next to the adversity.
Be well my friends & as always comment below with your own thoughts, opinions, feelings, pivotal moments, and finding the blessing in the adversity.
Catch you later, gator.